Clio
and I held back politely while the others ran through formal
introductions. She approached me first, with a hug and a
smile and declared "I would like to be with you."
The magic was obvious for all four of us. Sasha and Tony and
I had been friends for many years. We had always wanted to
get together and yet we never could seem to find the time.
Now Tony and Cleo were lovers and the circle seemed
complete. The guys wanted us to connect together, alone at
first, since all of this was so new for us, and perhaps
overwhelming. We assured them that we wanted them here with
us, to witness our love and share our joy.
Clio
wanted to be with me! Despite the presence of two incredibly
delicious men, two traditionally hetero-leaning ladies
connected soul to soul and chose above all else to be with
one another. As hugged her, I embraced Clio, I looked to
Sasha for "permission" (some part of me needs his
ok, another part realizes no ok’s needed.
Clio
stretched out on her back and invited me into her arms. I
joined her, flesh upon flesh. Our eyes met. She spoke
"is this what men fall in love with?" We smiled
and silently agreed. Our faces softened into curiosity. We
kissed our first kiss followed immediately by childlike
giggles in a final unconscious attempt to sabotage
ourselves. Then came recovery, composure, then passion
exploding and the giggles dissolved into squeals of delight.
It felt like a homecoming, so natural, so sweet. I longed
that all my sisters would know such tenderness and delight.
What a delicacy for the soul. My heart soared. I felt born
anew reconnecting with long-lost parts of me and finding
yes, indeed this too is good.
One day
in therapy I remembered my earliest sexual experience which
I had repressed and totally forgotten. I was about ten years
old and my girlfriend Pam was eleven. She was developing
breasts and I was absolutely fascinated by them. I would
grab them then we’d both giggle. On some level both of us
getting turned on and excited. The acts themselves were
forbidden. Parts of me were ashamed yet neither of us ever
verbalized our thoughts. We just experienced our desire by
acting upon them while simultaneously suppressing them,
erupting in an explosion of laughter, which we couldn’t
quite understand.
I woke
in the middle of the night in a puddle of what I believed
was urine. I cried from embarrassment and shame and my
friend’s mother rushed into the room, calmed my fears,
changed the sheets and assured me it was ok, accidents
happen to everyone. The incident puzzled me for there was no
smell or color and I had never lost control of my bladder
before or since. I was so embarrassed but somehow managed to
fall back asleep and never spoke of it to anyone.
Upon
reflection and from the perspective of what I know now, I
realize that I hadn’t wet the bed from urine, that I had
experienced the equivalent of a feminine "wet
dream" where I ejaculated amrita from the excitement
and stimulation of the activity with my girlfriend.
I’ve
learned that poly dating is a format where my hidden dreams
can become reality. I’ve hungered for the connection with
the beloved female for so long and repressed it due to my
programming which judged such things as "bad."
I felt so
full of love that wanted to gift Clio with my beloved and
his tantric skills. Sasha is so incredibly proficient at
freeing the female ejaculate. She had never experienced her
flow and felt inadequate as all of her girlfriends had. Once
again a sister felt competitive, throwing herself into
comparison with women who weren’t even there.
As I
looked at my two special beauties, my love for both of them
overflowed. I wanted dear Clio to experience the bliss that
she as a Goddess is entitled to know. Sasha and I became one
organism, one instrument of love. With Clio in the middle we
connected and sent our energy and love out through her
chakras removing in that instant any blocks to her complete
and total fulfillment as a woman.
She
flowed, and flowed, and flowed. The Goddess gave birth to
herself.
Tony had
remained silent, the witness, the observer. We gathered our
foreheads together in a hug and savored the energy of the
miracle we had all just witnessed. It mattered not whose
body gave or received or watched. We all felt it as if it
was our own body reveling in bliss. For that moment in time
the veil was pierced and we were truly all ONE.
|
