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Bisexuality is a
touchy subject in our culture. Many of us had
childhood experiences with same sex partners when we were
young and naive as we innocently played "Doctor"
or other genital revealing and touching games. It was
only after the negative reactions of adults that we adopted
the concept of "shame" and "bad."
In our primitive efforts to regain approval we had a
tendency to "throw the baby out with the bath
water" and bought into the concept of
"sin" and forgot the fun and pleasure when we
played.
As we grew we encountered additional programming from our
society and culture regarding sexuality and
homosexuality. Our peers and parents positioned
themselves on the either sides of a sharply-picketed fence
and either aligned themselves with "gays" and
"queers"; proud of their open-mindedness and
lack of prejudice or they identified themselves as
"straight" and "hetero" and knew they
were righteous, sinless, and on the side of
God.
We observed and analyzed, decided what was "right"
or perhaps "safe" and either aligned ourselves
with the status quo or rebelled and took a firm stance in
opposition. Perhaps we vacillated throughout our
lives, dancing in one camp or the other for a while as it
suited our situation at the time.
So now we have arrived, we're grown-up; adults, free to make
conscious decisions about who and what we really are
sexually. But how do we know what is "real",
what we authentically "feel" when we've been inundated
with unsolicited opinions and programming throughout our
lives? No wonder we're confused.
Women loving women seems to be widely accepted and common in
many cultures. While both men and women may be
bi-curious, women seem to be far more brave than men openly
acting out fantasies.
For many traditionally monogamous
couples, women loving women is the first avenue they explore
when branching into polyamory or swinging. The couple
searches for that perfect person for their first tryst or
relationship in personals and at alternative lifestyle
parties, seminars or conventions.
Homophobic attitudes block many men exploring loving
men. Over time in group lovemaking situations, men may
become more comfortable with seeing other men and may
gradually become more sensual with one another, especially
if they are sharing women. Some men may permit a man
to pleasure him while not
reciprocating.
Experiment. Experience
myriad emotions, notice your judgments: good, bad, ugly. Most of us
don't know how a road will feel until we begin walking
down it. Prepare for smooth and
rocky parts as you explore your personal path to
self-discovery and conscious awareness. You may
encounter some dark tunnels. If you push on through to
the other side you'll find light and freedom and replace
unconscious reactions with conscious pro-actions and
CHOICE.
For a the latest chapter on my continuing saga, click
here: Woman/Woman
Love and Polyamory.
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